Falling Down

I don't believe that cold temperatures cause cold viruses. Bowie played outside today several times. He actually was willing to be out of arms for a few minutes. Long enough to crawl on top of last summer's pool and soak up the rain collection. I am a zombie, feel like I haven't left the house in weeks, and now I've got a sore throat. It is harder taking care of him with a cold than a stomach bug because he is awake and has energy but we can't go around infecting people and he feels so crappy so needs me non-stop. It will pass. I'll barely even remember it. But man, I am falling apart right now. I've worn the same clothes for three days. Why bother?

Sick Again!

Bowie came home from the cabin trip sick with cough and runny nose. He's not lethargic and limp, but hasn't had much of an appetitie until today. He ate oatmeal, egg, toast and peach butter, a few bites of bean taco, spinach pizza, corn on the cob, a little raw carrot, 3 big strawberries, and gumbo with okra and rice. Oh, and a peanut butter cliff bar. So I'm hoping he's truly on the mend, but I expect the cold to last at least 2 more days.

Bowie has been nearly inconsolable a few times today. He woke up from a too short nap and the only thing that could shake him from a crying funk was the suggestion of driving the Trooper. So he happily hung out in the car while I wrote the alphabet on the sidewalk. Today is national handwriting day (according to a local public radio show). I used the sling twice today when he was demanding, "eat!" but wouldn't be out of arms, so he "helped" me cook ridng on my hip. I don't know what I'd do without it! When he gets upset and wants to be close but we are in a busy time, I ask him if he wants to ride in the sling and it always sounds good to him! I can go months without using it, but there are times when he is just obviously out of sorts and it's a lifesaver. As are the cars. And any kind of berry. These are my sure fire cures for helping him out of a downward spiral.

Bastrop

Bowie and I spent the past few days out at a cabin with two mama friends and their sons. Bowie was the big boy of the group. It's really fun to see him interacting with other children. It was so beautiful out there. Pine trees everywhere. Lots of rocks and pinecones to explore. I love the rustic buildings, built by the CCC. I love that Bowie spends so much time outside.

The Zoo

We went to the zoo today. Appropriate outing for the gorgeously warm winter day after seeing King Kong. Going to the zoo is so fun and so exciting, but also so sad. Just being near the animals is amazing, there is something really powerful about them. But they are so so heartbreaking, too. And so many people are so crude and mean towards them. And it tmakes me to outraged and ashamed. But I think that having even these brief, false encounters are so inspiring and cause so many things about our world to be wondered at. It is a wonderful experience, for us. At their expense. My opposing thoughts give me much to ponder. Expecially since it is such a massively strong event for a child. For Bowie it is clear that it filled in a lot of areas of knowledge, gave him context for so many books and stories and drawings and photographs. He must have learned at least 10 new words today. He was so observant and drawn in by the animals. And he was so physical, running from place to place, climbing against the fences. I could almost see the brain synapsis firing. But I kept thinking of the sad, sad story of King Kong.

Country Band

Chris's parents came to visit this weekend and brought MORE Christmas presents. The one that we all kept playing with all day was a box of musical instruments. Bowie was handing out instruments and directing us, dancing when we put together a jam.

Creekbed Hiking

Went hiking on the greenbelt with friends today. Three mamas carrying our sons in backpacks. The creekbed was completely dry which made for some awesome exploring.

Bowie's Room

I was inspired by a group blog that showed little areas of people's houses. So while Bowie was sleeping away his sickies the other afternoon, I took some pics of his bedroom. I am excited to see what choices he makes for his decor...will probably be a bit different from mine.

Getting Better

A smile! He's much better but still pretty weak and wary of food. It's sort of like having a 27 lb newborn. Thank goodness for the sling! I was able to vacuum and he was able to be held (there was no negotiating that point.) Here's hopin' that's that last we see of that bug.

Still Sick

I think that he's on the mend, but he's still sick. He slept throughout the day. And played a lot less than he had yesterday, but I think that was because he peaked today. But goodness, how can it be so cute to be so sick?! At dinner he did not want to eat but sat in his chair and laid his head on the table smiling and giggling, saying YUM but turning down all offers of food.

Sick Baby

Our poor baby woke up last night sick. He was throwing up all night and morning and a few times this afternoon and evening. He is running a raging fever so his cheeks are as red as cherries. Poor dear. This morning he was singing and playing through it all, but by the afternoon his energy started to wane. Poor dear was like a wet noodle. We are so hoping that it's just a 24 hour bug and that he'll be fine soon...and that we won't catch it. Taking care of him in this state is a near constant connection. How to do that when one of us is so ill?

Chris did comment that as sad as it is to see him so sick, it is a sweet thing for him to be so cuddly. Bowie and Chris took many naps together today.

Good Morning

What we wake up to!

Little Boy Buddha Beneath the Bodhi Tree

I don't care how narcissistic or self indulgent this may seem. I am head over heels for our son. Not just because he has my blue eyes, Chris' full lips, and a golden mop of crazy hair. But also because he is joyful, inquisitive, silly, brilliant, independent, cuddly, reckless, cautious, on and on and on. All the things all babes are. All the things we were and can be again. He shows me this everyday. And he makes the world beautiful by being here with us.

He is now saying, "I love you!" For him to hug my knees as tightly as he can and say, "I love you, mama" is utterly transcendent.

Window Into Another World

This is my ode to Andy Goldsworthy and CS Lewis. Although, unlike Goldsworthy, I did not create this perfect circle subtly and stunningly floating in a stagnant pool, I find this image calls to mind his beautiful natural sculptures in water. And I have just read the first two books in the Chronicles of Narnia to Bowie (it is our "nursing book" as Bowie calls it). In The Magician's Nephew the world in between the worlds is linked by ponds. Michele and I immediately thought of this when we saw this pond.

Mother Nature's Son

We spent our new year's day camping out at Pedernales State Park. It was unseasonable warm (in the 80s) so of course we went dipping out in the river. I can't look at this photograph without singing the Beatles' Mother Nature's Son.

Michele, Jack and Finn spent the night with us. Our campsite was littered with a little pedaling Harley, tricycle, soccer ball, basketball, bouncy ball, hats (good luck keeping a hat on Bowie) and dogs. Our neighbors, the Groces, came out for a hike. We must have been quite a beautiful sight- three papas carrying their sons in backpacks along the trail.

Do Re Mi

One of the songs that I sing to Bowie is Do Re Mi (well a portion of it) from The Sound of Music. Bowie sings along with me, especially supplying the last word of a phrase. The other night we were all in the family room together and Chris started playing the song on a bamboo flute (without any sheetmusic...just picked it out of the air, musical genius that he is) and the third phrase into it, Bowie started singing. Not from the beginning, but at "Mi, a name I call myself" (of course not quite that clearly, more like "Mi, name i ll melf"). My jaw dropped! He totally recognized the tune on his own and joined in at the correct time! I am completely amazed. And so pleased, of course.

What the Elves Left

We got a wheelbarrow and garden tools for Bowie's Christmas morning gift. We put a tag that said "For Bowie" on it and put it on the backporch (Chris was worried about the damage that could be done with for metal tools on long poles). Bowie hasn't quite got the hang of pushing his wagon, yet. But he likes to copy mama and put sticks in it (we are trying to make some improvements in our sorry backyard). I am glad I have a picture of Bowie wearing these pajamas. At first I was disappointed that I didn't get him some cute snowman or snowflake pj's, but now I am glad that I got to capture Bowie in what are my favorite pj's.

Honey, Bowie's Beautiful Cousin

One of the great things about Christmas was that my sister, her boyfriend and their daughter came out and stayed overnight, too. We were all together and that has happened since...well, I don't know when. Bowie LOVES Honey and talks about her all of the time.

I was Home for Christmas

We spent Christmas Eve night out at my parent's house in Driftwood. They decorated it stunningly! We ate our traditional velvet chicken and dumplings with broccoli. Bowie could not get enough of the lttle green trees. We then watched March of The Penguins in their theater room (adults sipping egg nog with brandy). It was a wonderful experience. Bowie mostly played bongos and danced but did find himself momentarily fascinated a few times, and Honey was completely transfixed by it. She was bursting with excitement when the chicks hatched and so sad and afraid at the dangers that the penguins experience. After getting Bowie to sleep, Chris and I put together our gift to Honey- a beautiful doll tree house. It was so magical to sit in the lights of the tree and assembling toys, feeling quite a lot like elves.

the advent photo album

These were the last two photos in the advent photo album. I let Bowie choose between a snowglobe and this nutcracker. I am thrilled that he chose the nutcracker. One of the books that I received as a little girl was The Nutcracker. The way he says "nut crapper" is hilarious.

Our Dr Seuss Tree

We bought this very stylized artificial tree three years ago. We wanted to have a tree but have very limited floor space. We found a tree that is about 1o feet tall but has a diameter of about 3 feet. We call it our Dr Seuss tree. Lighting it has been a challenge because wires can't be hidden at all. This year we got the light tubes and rather than winding them around the tree, draped them from top to bottom. I'm very pleased with it! Bowie's favorite ornament seems to be the snare drum.

Winter Solstice with Friends

Wednesday Bowie and I went to a winter solstice party with some of my favorite friends and their lovely mamas. The children spent a great deal of time in Finn's jeep (Finn is 20 months old and already has his first car! which was his father's first car! Bowie will be green with envy when he figures out what this means.) We mamas munched on delicious food (two of the mamas were professional chefs before motherhood.) And we had drawn names and each child opened one gift. So sweet. Finn had already found a Christmas present, an ukeklele! If there was any doubt about whether Bowie will enjoy his gift from Chris, that picture shows Bowie getting as close to it as he can. We love our friends!

Little Master

The Grey Coat

I've been very excited about this set of advent pages. I found this little coat at the thrift store. I was so thrilled! I thought that even if he didn't wear it much I'd get some photos. Well, when he wore it to the capitol yesterday, he was the star of the show! "Little Gentleman" "Little Lord" "Little Master" hmmmm, all the titles might go to *MY* head.

Merry Tuba Christmas

This morning we met up with some friends, Uncle Paul and Honey at the capitol for a Christmas concert performed by over 200 tubA players. In the photo above you see some of the euphoniums. It was pretty confusing to Bowie that I kept saying we were going to see tubas; he kept looking at Tuba, our dog. But he got to touch the valves of a couple horns and seemed to have sorted it all out by the end of the concert.

My Bakers

I woke up Saturday and Chris had started a batch of bagels. He is so ambitious! They were really good and he's looking forward to perfecting the recipe and his techniques. They weren't the prettiest things (though Chris did describe one as "something you'd see at the store") but what a treat! And Bowie enjoyed helping out, of course.

Today Chris made a batch of gumbo and pizza. The photo above shows Bowie rolling out his baby sized pizza. He spread the sauce and added his toppings while pinching off tastes of dough. It was a fun mess!

Last night, Chris and I went out to two parties. My folks stayed with Bowie. He had a hard time going down to sleep with them, but had a great time with them, too. He's been asking for Nonnie all day. Chris and I truly enjoyed our evening out, but Bowie was never out of our minds as Chris showed off his "album" of laminated wallets. "He's beautiful!" "That makes me want to have a baby!" were repeated over and over again. And when asked about being a mother, I couldn't hold back my total elation about our family.

Advent Pages 17 and 18

O Kismas Tee

Here are days 15 and 16. These pictures were taken at John and Karen's house. Since they travel for the holidays, they haven't had a tree for years. Bowie changed that! And I think that they are very happy to have a tree again. Bowie has been amazingly gentle with the trees. We've had ours up for almost 2 weeks and (knock-knock) there are no broken ornaments. I'm truly surprised and pleased!

Laguna Gloria

A few days ago we went to the Laguna Gloria Art Musuem grounds for an advent calendar photo shoot. I remember going there as a little girl, wandering the walks, watching an outdoor showing of a Hitchcock movie, attending art festivals. It is a wonderful place to be - a relaxed, open, natural environment that is on the whole very safe for Bowie to explore independently.
Here he approaches a sculpture made from what seemed to be cedar wood.

BOWIE's

Advent calendar page for the 13th and 14th.

Today Bowie:
*said his own name
*learned (and perfected the mount by practicing for at least 30 minutes while I bent over holding the bike upright) how to get on a bicycle by stepping on the down pedal and swinging his other foot over the seat
*is teething those 2nd year molars and has a very little patience (or is that me?)
*called Daniel and Kendal by name

Readers

No wonder Bowie loves to read! Here he is Grandma and Grandpa Stutsman.

Christmas Chaos

Here you see Bowie with one of the balloon hats Chris made and wearing his art apron.

Stocking

First Christmas of the Season

Catching up on the advent pages. The lollipop is the first candy Bowie has had. He wasn't sure what to do with it. I showed him to lick it. After about 15 minutes, it still looks totally whole. But he had a great time!

After going to the sweet baptism of our friend Oslo on Saturday morning, we drove to Dallas for our Stutsman Christmas. It really felt like Christmas. We ate great food and better dessert. Bowie is singing "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" and "Rudolph". It's super adorable.

Bowie enjoyed opening presents but someone else's was just as interesting as his own. The highlight was the many many balloon hats and figures made by Chris. He got a balloon blowing kit and immediately got to work, making a dog without even looking at the book. He amazes me all of the time.

Now I need to find places for all of our new, fun things. Bowie got a beautiful easel from his grandparents. Hopefully I'll get through with the "work" soon and we can go outside and paint (the weather is very nice, no threat of icicles.)

Sharing Icicles

Just as the sun was setting the neighborhood boys came to our house looking for big icicles. We shared ours with them. I love that these two boys come hang out in our yard. They sometimes come play in our yard when we are gone. I think that it's wonderful that they feel welcome here. That's how a neighborhood should be.

Ice Day!

Here's Bowie playing with the Christmas Legos that John and Karen (Chris' folks) gave us last year in the advent calendar. Everyday had a little set of Legos and a picture of an object you could make with them. It was really fun.

Today Chris got to stay home for an ice day! YAY! It's so much more fun when we are all together. Right now Chris is outside putting up lights and drinking a beer, never too cold for a cold beer!!

Thank You

Days 5 and 6 in the calendar.

At lunch, Bowie said, "Thank you" to me! That's the first time he's said it to me totally self-initiated. What a sweet child.

Big Scary Oops

Last night we went to the Zilker Christmas Tree with Michele and Finn. It was fun spinning under all of those lights. We played "Ring around the Rosie" and we swung the boys in circles. Then we got on an empty stage. Ah, recipe for disaster? Would you have done it? Well, we did although all us adults entertained some feelings of nervousness. All was well, until Bowie ran to the back of the stage reaching for the railing. I was just feet from him. I know that he wanted to grab it and lean out like he does on the playscapes. But he couldn't reach it and fell straight down onto the ground below, at least a 4 foot drop. I screamed so that my voice was hoarse all night and leapt after him (hoping as i jumped down that my animal mind looked at his position so that I wouldn't jump right ON him.) He was still and silent until I picked him up. His dirt covered face was frozen in a huge scream and inhale. It took several seconds before he finally wailed. It was so terrifying. I didn't cry like I did when he pulled hot water onto himself. I was too scared. I held him and rocked him while Chris checked over his body, sqeezing his arms and legs, hands, rubbing his head to see if Bowie reacted in pain. About five minutes later Bowie was calm but clearly dazed. I wondered if we should be concerned about a concussion, but his eyes looked fine. By the time we got home, we was quite nearly himself. That's when I finally could react. I was a tense ball of nerves all evening. I felt guilty for letting my baby get hurt. I questioned whether I had done something wrong, been negligent. It had been my suggestion after all to go up on the stage. (reminding me of the time that i suggested that the window be "base" and destiny cut open her arm, slicing her wrist tendon in half the morning or my grandfather's funeral.) But really, I want him to take risks. Reasonal ones, of course. I don't want to overly protect him and create an atmosphere of distrust. But it is so hard to see him hurt! I told Chris that I was just gonna sleep with Bowie, but he suggested that we all sleep together in our bed. It's a tight, tight squeeze with Chris bearing the brunt of Bowie's kicks. I gave him arnica tablets every time I thought of it and this morning he has a slight bruise on his left eye and scratches above and below. Poor, poor baby. But it could have been terribly worse. It could have been awful. I am so grateful that it wasn't as bad as it might have been.

A small oops. I had told my mom a few weeks ago that wooden train stuff and even a playtable would be good for Bowie. I had a little train set in my car today and she saw it. It was clear that she was hurt. I told her that I could take it back. That she could give the train set and table. Oops!

So I'm off to create another magical Santa gift idea...

Christmas Shopping

Today Chris ordered his gift to Bowie. He's getting him...yes, you guessed it, an instrument. A ukulele. We want to get Bowie a trundle train play table and set up a wooden train set during the night for Bowie's "Santa Gift." I'm sort of shocked by how excited I am. I hope he experiences the sense of magic and wonder I remember feeling waking up to see special things arranged in the light of the Christmas tree. And the treats and family playing games. I want it to be all the good things it can be.

I need a beautiful sweater

days 3 and 4. this is the first time i've hung up a white sheet as a backdrop. i think that it worked okay. it is hard to get him to stay in front of it, compromising the capturing of the authentic bowie. but pretty, i think.

i got that blue sweater at saver's thrift store. it is so beautiful and soft. i love sweaters and wish it were cool enough to wear them more often. bowie has more beautiful sweaters than i do. well, i don't have ANY beautiful sweaters, so that's not saying much, i guess, except that i need at least ONE beautiful sweater. maybe i'll get one for christmas.

Advent calendar

days 1 and 2 in the photo album advent calendar i'm making for the grandfolks. i did one last year for them, and i hope to keep it up as a tradition. it will be fun in future years when bowie can help contribute ideas.

Run, Sing, Speak

Almost a year later.

Bowie is RUNNING, dancing, spinning. He still crawls every once in awhile. And loves to lie down on the floor everywhere we go.

He's singing songs with us which is absolutely mind blowing. Chris taught him Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire." He sings "down down down" "burn burn burn."

He used signs for a long time and still uses many but now chooses to talk. It's hard for me to remember to look up new signs. At last count he had over 60 signs.

And he's got to be using over a hundred words. For real. I'm totally amazed. Of course, I'm not sure that everyone else hears all of his words the way I do.