Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Remembrance



Now I'm crying. I held it together all along (except for the slightly sick feeling in my gut). But now, alone, looking at this ponytail of Bowie's baby hair...golden, soft and fine, it's been with him through all his life and now it is cut from him. I will keep it to stroke and hold myself. My boy. My baby.

About a month ago, Bowie started saying that he wanted to cut his hair short. Shave it like his papa's. I said that if he still felt that way after we came back from vacation that we'd do it. It's his hair. He should choose. I have a friend that dated a young man who kept his hair very short and didn't want anyone to touch it because his hair as a boy had been long and curly and he hated the attention. I always thought of this when *my* desire to keep it long butted against Bowie's wishes to cut it. Well, he didn't mention it again until a few days ago. We've been swimming alot (REALLY swimming ya'll, more about that later) and I think it's really been bugging him that his whole face would get covered by his hair. So we went to Cool Cuts for Kids, showed them an adorable skaterdude haircut that Bowie and I both liked and he ended up with this conservative cut. Next time I'll be more of a bear and make sure we get what we want, but I just wanted it to be as easy as possible for him and he was an ANGEL. What a big boy. Truly.

9 comments:

... said...

Oh my goodness! i am feeling for you right now!!! what is his hair like now??? he's still stunningly beautiful!

Anonymous said...

Oh, Autumn. Oh no. I know that heart-sinking feeling.

Stefanie Weber Photography said...

while i have lived vicariously through bowie's curls (my son's hair is stick straight), i applaud you for stepping back and letting bowie make his own decision. you are an awesome mom. i can't wait to see the pictures of him with his new 'do!

Anonymous said...

gosh, that takes strength to step back and let his path be chosen by him. i admire that strength in you wise momma, and how sad that is too. your mention of how those curls were with him since he was born... that was the hardest part of me cutting my son's hair too. hugs to you today! he's still your baby inside those gorgeous eyes!

Anonymous said...

Hugs to you sweet mama...its such a hard thing watching them grow up and start making up their own minds. ((hugs to you tonight))

Autumn said...

thank you all. my eyes are all out of tears, and that is a good think, you know? i'm happy for him now. he told me while putting his hands on my face, "i want you to be happy about this." awwwwwwww my lovely maturing boy

Anonymous said...

Oh geez! I was so shocked when I saw the photo on flickr I had to come right over here and see what happened. I am SO sorry to see all of his gorgeous golden curls gone - he looks so grown up so suddenly. I know it's not quite the same, but I was the same way when we had Maddy's hair cut into that chin-length bob last year, after her hair had been nearly (albeit finely) down to her backside. She wanted it short, but now she wants it long again and it's lovely and thick and gorgeous. But anyway I'm yabbering. He looks gorgeous with his sweet little cut, and I am sure it will grow on you in no time. And I just gotta say I think you are AMAZING for wanting him to feel right with the way he looks for himself, and letting him make his own decision regarding his hair.

Rashmi said...

(((hugs)))
He looks so handsome but I know how sad you must be feeling.

Anonymous said...

Ohhh Autumn. You brave, sweet Mama you. And he is still stunningly gorgeous with his new cut. I think you did the right thing... :) How does Bowie like his hair now?